I Confess

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My fellow finalist Sensible Mom has tagged me to play the blogging game, "I Confess." And since confession is the first step towards repentance, here goes…

I confess… to not praying anywhere near as often as I should. Not because I don't think it's important, but because I never get around to it. Ironically enough, I was most consistent during the summer when I dormed at Georgetown. Not many Orthodox Jews get the chance to pray consistently on a Jesuit campus, I imagine.

I am pretty consistent about saying the Blessing for the Torah; and I recite Psalm 121 almost every day. It's a personal favorite.

I confess… to sometimes using my disability to get out of physical work. This is counterbalanced by my pride and desire not to be limited by my disability; on one memorable occasion during our Philmont backpack, my brother used this pride against me when I was slacking off, with devastating results. Sneaky devil, him.

I confess… to jointly owning original Advanced Dungeons & Dragons manuals by Gary Gygax. This was a late enough revision that races and classes were already separate, but well before 2nd Edition. They were gifts from a dear friend of the family when my brother and I were growing up, who I haven't heard from in years.

I confess… that I simply despise small-talk. I can talk for hours about things, but I am congenitally incapable of simply talking for the sake of talking. As you can imagine, this makes socializing difficult. On that topic…

I confess… that when I am among girls, I can feel myself giving off a powerful vibe of I am completely out of my element. It's an amazingly effective repellant; I just might license the patent to Coleman for use against mosquitos.

I confess… to chronically being in the middle of half a dozen projects, one of which is a book which is getting progressively less muddled with each aborted draft.

I confess… to being extremely private with my friends on campus. At one point, I realized that almost nobody around me knew my birthday, where I went to school, anything about my family (except that I had a brother), or anything about my earlier experiences.

I confess… that my deepest regrets concerning by disability are that it makes attracting a wife harder (particularly when I don't put in the work on my end), that I am a poor dancer, and that I could not serve in the military.

I confess… that I deal civilly enough with some people who I think of scornfully, and during whole conversations I imagine braining them with a 2x4, as I smile and nod.

I confess… to admiring myself in mirrors or other reflective surfaces. (Honestly, how could I possibly resist?)

I confess… that if I could ignore all the obligations on me and assume that money were no object, I would live in a tastefully opulent mansion in the Golan Heights, where I would drink fine wine, write my books, make music, pray, meditate and become a practitioner of medical Chi Gong. Oh, and bomb the hell out of every oil well in the Middle East.

That's it. Now I have to pass this game along to somebody… I think I'll tag Geek With a .45, my friend Ezra Klein, Soccer Dad, and Eric of Eric's Grumbles.